My injury fifteen years ago changed many people besides me. Scott and crew wouldn't dare pick on the crippled guy, of course, but beyond that their behaviour became less juvenile, from my perspective.
Awhile after moving from neurology to rehab some of this group came to visit. Many people, lots of them my age with minimal part time income, gave me money. It was not huge amounts but I most definitely appreciated it. Scott felt terrible that he had no money to give so he gave me a pendant he had earned with his hockey team.
Again, the money was appreciated, but it comes and goes. The guys who came to visit, Scott's gift of this chain and the fact that they had the maturity to come visit a guy, once their target of ridicule, not difficult to be around in his vulnerable state, meant the most and will stick with me.
I'm not sure what took Scott, but I do know that he had health issues a few years after my injury and that his announcement stated that donations could be made to the Lupus, Diabetes or Heart & Stroke Foundation.
Just another person that left us too soon, but one I certainly will not forget.
very proud of you son for your kind words and hope many people read them.
ReplyDeleteThank you. I hope so, as well.
ReplyDeleteJay, I want to thank you for the kind words about our son Scott. I remember him talking about his visit with you, and he made the comment that he shouldn't complain, that there is always someone else that's in worst shape then him. He kept that vow and he always never complained or whined about his illness, or that he had to take chemo or dialysis. He saw so much when he was in the hospitals and he always said there are people here with bigger problems then mine. That visit with you and his experiences after he got sick, gave him a positive outlook on his life and he was thankful for every day that he was able to go and do something. He never complained about how he was feeling until this last 6 months, and he said he was getting tired of being always sick and tired. I am so thankful that he went and visited you and because of you he tried to live his life without complaining and tried to enjoy every minute.
ReplyDeleteYou are welcome. What I said is true.
ReplyDeleteAs much as Scott was right, there is always someone in worse shape than you, it does not mean that your struggles are not significant to you and those around you. I know that I also need to be reminded that there are a lot of people who are worse off than I. People who cannot feed themselves, get around independently or even breathe on their own. I have my times of pity party and have been working on a photo that I will post soon that I hope will convey some of my feelings last little while. But one trip to any hospital or care home keeps my attitude in check.
It is good to know that my experience has influenced others positively. I will do my best to remember what you said about Scott being thankful for every day that he was able to go and do something. I know how frustrating it can be to have goals, short-term or long-term, crushed or postponed by poor health. I know the feeling of being sick of being sick and tired, but I am sure not to the extent that Scott did.
I wish you well in your grieving and moving on when the time is right.